remember when on a diet.

. If you eat something and no one sees you eat it, it has no
calories.

2. When you eat with someone else, calories don't count if you do not
eat more than they do.

3. Food used for medicinal purposes NEVER count, such as hot
chocolate, brandy, toast and Sara Lee Cheesecake.

4. If you fatten up everyone else around you, then you look thinner.

5. Things licked off knives and spoons have no calories if you are in
the process of preparing something.

6. Anything consumed while standing has no calories. This is due to
gravity and the density of the caloric mass.

7. Anything consumed from someone else's plate has no calories since
the calories rightfully belong to the other person and will cling to
his/her plate.

Also, STRESSED spelled backwards is DESSERTS )

 

Fab, least im doin somet right!!!